What annoys me about Tinder

I seem to know very few people who haven't at least tried Tinder, and most seem to be active users. I include myself in that bracket. Tinder seems to have slowly become the dating platform of choice, does anyone use Match.com anymore?

Back in November 2013 (nearly a year ago now) I attended the official London launch of Tinder (oddly hosted a year after the actual launch I believe!), and I've dipped my toe in the Tinder waters ever since.

There are a few things that really stand out to me now that more people are online dating than ever before (rather unbelievably, I've online dated for about 18 years, definitely ahead of that trend!). 

I'm confused about what men think women want, or maybe I'm wrong, and men only do these things because lots of women do actually want it (and I'm the anomaly).

Posing with tigers

The cliche is amazingly more true than you would like to imagine. So so many pictures of men posing alongside drugged and sad tigers (and other wild animals on chains). Is the idea that these men are showing how brave they are? How they afforded a gap year once? That they're rounded and cultured human beings? The men usually have sunglasses on (not a great dating pic as you can't see their face) and the picture is usually old (not a great dating pic as you're not dating them 4 years ago). Why oh why are there so many of these on tinder profiles?

Topless pictures

I once read an article as a younger women in a magazine, which tried to explain why men are often accused of being too rough during sexual touching, and women are often too slow/weak touched. It said that we often act out what we wish was being done to us, so women use a lighter touch as they'd prefer a lighter touch, and vice versa. This is the only explanation I have for the countless men posing topless in their Tinder pictures; that they'd like to see the bodies of the Tinder women they scroll through. Do women really ever go for these men? Am I being snobby about my belief we should have our clothes on?

Ski-ing/Sports Pictures

Again, these have become a Tinder-joke, but blimey, these pictures are everywhere! They make for a terrible profile, you can't see the person's face at all - they could be photos of anyone. I also refuse to believe that all of these people have done these sky jumps/ski-ing trips recently. Dating pictures should be up-to-date people. No one cares that you jumped off a bridge during your gap year in Australia; I promise you.

Photos of you as a child

No one cares what you looked like when you were seven. Keep your family memories back over on facebook where they belong.

Dismissive statements

Tinder gives you a small profile section, if you'd like to add some text. I've noticed an odd trend for people to make sweeping dismissive statements, as if they're a dating king. Things along the lines of:

"If you're a smoker; jog on"

"I won't message first as you girls get tons of messages"

"Enough with the Marilyn quotes girls."

"If you've got nothing more than blonde hair and boobs, swipe left."

Get off your high horses for a moment there lads. No one asked you.

Obsession with height

Similarly in the text section, the vast majority of men reference their height. They'll usually say something like, "I'm 6ft2 cos apparently that matters" or "5ft10, so you don't need to ask" or more jokingly, "If it matters, I'm 5ft11, but if it doesn't matter I'm still 5ft11".

One guy had written something that alluded to girls asking crytic questions in an attempt to suss out his height. I'd love to know what they could have been: Does he have to duck when walking through doors? Has he ever been mistaken for a child?

Is this really what most women try and suss out first? Blimey