We don't only grieve in death

Grief covers such a spectrum of events and emotions, and I was reflecting on my own experiences of grief today, so I figured I'd share some thoughts.

In an old blog post of mine, I shared my thoughts on the deepest pain that the death of a loved one can bring. In it, I explain that my "heart literally shattered" and how "I literally became another person when he left me." That form of grief is long, dark and painful. But of course, life always goes on, and you come out of the otherside. Part of me thinks that if something (well, when) tragically sad happens to me again that it simply wouldn't hurt that bad. As if my heart, once shattered and repaired, will break more easily this time (and therefore less painfully). I almost imagine a once perfect vase that smashed tragically, but if it broke again you just wouldn't be quite as sad about it.

However, there are lesser, but just as real types of grief we experience. We may lose a friend, a job, a hobby, a pet, a beloved home or a way of life. We may have been dumped, or even done the dumping, and need space to grieve what we had, and what may have been.

That is often the hardest challenge with grief; having to let go of the hopes you had for the future. Those dreams and plans just have to disappear.

We'd be foolish to fear grief though, it's a given that we will all tread its well worn boards at some point. Some of us may be walking its path more than others, but we'll all pass through. We must grieve and yet not wallow. Time is far too precious to waste in sadness.