Valentine's Day is creeping up on us, and it's given me a pause for thought, about what relationships are capable of being, and why we so often settle for something that is by no means good enough.
I stumbled across these videos this evening, and stayed up far too late watching just one more after just one more...
My first response to the first one I watched was that their honesty and love for each other was achingly beautiful. They're clearly best friends, and such a team.
This next couple are much younger, and have only been together for 2 months, but her attempts to describe how wanting to say that she loves him gets stuck behind her teeth is painfully accurate. The question "What are you hesitant to tell me?" is such a heavy one to ask a loved one.
Kat and Christina demonstrate such an understanding, and a willingness to emotionally connect. I adored the line, "I don't want me or my deafness to stop you becoming the person you are supposed to be." They remind us that love and a loved one is supposed to cheerlead us, and allow us to be the very best version of ourselves.
The next one reminded me of the fact that so much goes unsaid, when we believe it to be much more explicit than it is. That we need to tell people they are loved and supported, and not presume they already know.
This final one I wanted to share is actually a follow up from the couple's first video. The first was from before the birth, this one is after the baby has been born, perhaps a year later. They've been married 11 years. Sidra describes how they almost got a divorce, and she describes that love is not enough. What is needed is an active choice; each and every day, to choose each other. She also states that she feels there will never be enough time, that time passes so quickly, and so she reminds herself to live in the present. To enjoy and appreciate the here and now.
Listening to these couples, in different stages of relationships, with different challenges, reminds me of the power of creating a foundation of love, support and trust. They all demonstrate such a freedom to acknowledge their own needs and feelings. They remind us that love should make us feel free and able to face any challenge, and that you're two whole people coming together, not two halves.
On the flipside, some of the comments under these videos were people saying they now realised they'd not had decent partners or friends, and that seeing a healthy love on the screen made them see what they should be holding out for. We're all too guilty of somehow settling for less.
What is so brilliant about this video project is that this is not a fairytale version of romance, but a real reflection of how awesome (in the true sense of the word) love can be.