That final half stone......does it really matter?

I think the tone of this post may be a little surprising, because what I would love to write is that of course it doesn't matter, and that we can be happy with ourselves regardless of a silly six pounds of weight. In a way, that is what this post is saying, but it also says something else about choice.

Half a stone is such a small amount of weight and a lot of us with naturally fluctuate over the year (or even over a month) within these six pounds, and not even really notice. But it is big enough for you to notice it yourself.

Here I am in India, and definitely at the larger side of my weight. Within my weight fluctuations I don't vary much in clothing size, so I go from a large 14 to a small 12, which isn't much of a difference really but actually is for my body and face.

Here I am in 2006, and again I have that extra little weight in my face (not helped by very unflattering polo shirt I am very aware!

And two years later in 2008, a rather unflattering picture of me, but feeling a little on my larger size.

I have worked hard to accept my own body and am now pretty happy with the ins and outs and soft bits that I have. However this doesn't mean (however contradicting it sounds) that I can't be happier when I am at the smaller end of my little scale (large 14 to small 12).

When I finally took a bit of control over the food I was shovelling in my mouth, I felt I lost some of that 'bloat'. That bit of my body that wasn't happy with its health. Most people probably don't even notice, but I do. My belly is still round and soft, but less extended and bloated. I also have more energy.

I don't own scales, so I have no clue if the amount of body change is actually 6 pounds, I don't care what the number of a scale says, I care about how I feel in my clothes. And I feel better when I am a size 12, rather than 14.

However, I have no desire to go smaller. I actually don't want to be a size 10, honestly. If I had the time and money for a personal trainer and expensive gym membership, I would love to get some muscle under my softness, but I am pretty happy with my shape and size. Overall, I am finally happy enough with my body. Thank flip for that.