I'm single, and heading towards 30. My friends are starting to get married and get pregnant. The unspoken question in the air tends more often to be, 'So when will you have a baby?'.
That elephant in the room, that trumpets more loudly as women age.....our ticking ovaries.
So....when will I have a baby? It's odd that the question is rarely will I have a baby but when. As if I have no option to opt out, should I wish. Interestingly the internet has connected me with quite a few women who are saying they choose not to have a child. Until recently I had never had the experience of talking to a woman who said they had chosen to remain child-free.
I think there is still a lot of judgement over child-free women - were they overlooked? Not good enough to keep a man? Do they have a medical reason they can't concieve?
I'm not saying I won't have a child, but actually I feel that as a woman, I have to give up more than most men. When women are pregnant, they don't seem to be asked, 'Who will give up work?', it's presumed that if any parent goes part time or stops work it will be the woman. If a mother and father are equal parents, why is the number of stay-at-home dads still so low? Are women still earning less? Am I over-estimating the number of women who would like to keep working full time?
Fathers don't get called 'working dads' so why are mothers who work called 'working mums' still?